We've reached week 30. I can hardly believe it. Last year at this time, at 29 weeks, we were given the news that our baby girl had congenital heart disease. I was also going into preterm labor and was in the hospital for a week. We didn't know if Dylan was going to be born two months early and if we were going to lose her right there and then. From that point, it became a daily waiting game.
Ultimately, we had to say goodbye to our Dylan after just 25 hours of being born. Our world crashed down and we've struggled to go back to a normal life.
A few months later, we were blessed with the surprise of being pregnant again. This time, with a boy. To be honest, I was crushed, because I wanted my Dylan back so much - I wanted a girl. And in feeling that, I am so guilty for not loving this boy from start for who he is - not who wasn't able to replace for me.
There is no replacement of Dylan. I realize that. And this little boy will be her younger brother. She will watch over him and protect him as only a big sister can.
